Dealing with Depression, Part 2
Recap
In Part 1, I discussed the lead up to taking antidepressants for, essentially, the first time in my life. I don’t think this post will be nearly as long, because the form will be different, but I wanted to catalog some of the biggest things I noticed when I started taking antidepressants that I hadn’t read before, or heard anecdotally until I took them.
I started taking antidepressants for the first time just before Thanksgiving, and I have been trying to get back into the swing of things (content creation, gaming, reading, hobbies in general). I decided to finally take antidepressants because it felt so overwhelming to not be able to enjoy the things I used to—reading, watching new-to-me media, gaming…
I was only partially prepared for the side effects, however. I am not going to detail all of them. I am only going to bullet out the ones that caught me off guard. But if you’re interested in a recounting of everything I had to say about it, I have a fairly SFW thread on Twitter you can check out for all the thoughts I’ve had since starting medication.
I started antidepressants yesterday evening and did not sleep well despite being absolutely exhausted.
So I think I might need to take them in the mornings instead.
— Chestburster đź‘˝ (@ChestnutPlays) November 27, 2019
Things They Don’t Tell You
- You’ll read that antidepressants can make you tired. What they don’t tell you is that they can also keep you awake. Of course, I fell into the category that was kept awake by them. Which, in the long run, has worked in my favor. I take my meds in the morning and I feel myself waking up about thirty minutes afterwards.
- You’ll go through a phase of, “Is that a medication side effect, or is this just me?”. It may cause a lot of anxiety. Push through this.
- You will question what it feels like to be neurotypical. Go with it. Note your questions. They’ll help you later on. Actually, just journal in general. It’s helpful during this time, both for you and your doctor.
- When you eventually start to feel better, you’ll still struggle (at first) with getting back to things you enjoy. Take it in baby steps.
- Don’t drink. Seriously. It screwed with me for days the one time I had a little bit of alcohol while out at AVNs. Just don’t do it.
- Folks you’re close to will start to see a change before you will. And if they don’t know you very well, they may be confused with the change.
Taking antidepressants was a rough beginning, but now, most days, my depression is manageable. I’m finally feel like I am at a point where it’s mostly difficult to pinpoint how bad my depression used to be, which is a good thing. There are still some tough days, but they are not nearly as difficult as when I wasn’t taking medication—which is a very good thing!