Blaugust Promptapalooza: Influences

Blaugust Promptapalooza

Hello! Welcome to Gamer Girl Confessions. For those that haven’t been here before, I’m Chestnut! I talk a bit about a lot of different nerdy things here, so I hope you find something that you connect with! I am today’s host for the Blaugust Promptapalooza, hosted by the ever-amazing Belghast. Today’s prompt is, “Tell us about a person(s) or thing(s) that has greatly influenced you.”

Before I get into my prompt, I want to give a quick shout out to Heather of Just Geeking By for sending everyone over here with her prompt. I also want to introduce tomorrow’s prompt-bearer: Syp! Syp’s blog, Bio Break, is something that has influenced me to try and be a better writer and blogger (look at me tying in the prompt!), so I am honored to be able to introduce such an amazing blog and human being to those who may not have had the luck of reading his content!

Also, a quick Content Warning before I tackle this prompt myself: This post discusses depression and may tackle the plethora of things that can go with it, including suicidal ideation. I am okay/safe, but depression and anxiety are two things I don’t shy away from discussing on this blog in an attempt to normalize a condition that many (including myself) deal with on a day-to-day basis. If this makes you uncomfortable, please don’t force yourself to continue reading.

Sailor Moon

I am a Moonie (see 4) for life. I thought I’d discussed this before in the blog, but upon some scrolling and searching, it seems I haven’t actually discussed this in length. So perhaps it is something that I’ve mentioned on Twitter in passing. Regardless Sailor Moon is something that has greatly influenced me, because Sailor Moon saved my life.

As a pre-teen, I had the unfortunate experience of discovering my anxiety and depression (genetics, man…), but not having the words to describe them, or the people in my life to try and listen to what I was going through to get me help. I didn’t know what to do with myself, or how to make it go away. But you learn early to pretend to be okay so that you blend in. I was in a bad spot, and I didn’t have many friends in school as the fat girl.

I found myself in a dark place, but something that drew me out of that was Sailor Moon. In a way, it became a sort of obsession (and has remained one, to a degree). But that’s only because it was something that made all that pain go away, even if only for the 20 or so minutes it was on the television. I timed my days around Sailor Moon, ensuring that I was up early enough before school to catch an episode, and that my homework was as complete as possible before it came on in the afternoons after school so that I wouldn’t get in too much trouble if I watched it.

I even role played as various characters online for years (and that’s in fact how I met one of my two best friends whom I’ve known over 20 years, now). As an adult, I still very much enjoy everything Sailor Moon. I won’t say goodbye to it, because it kept me alive as a pre-teen and teenager. That little bit of light of Sailor Moon in my day kept me from ending my life multiple times. So it will always remain a very big influence in my life.

I had other thoughts on things that have been big influences in my life. My journals, stickers, my internet friends (whom’ve helped me through some rough times in my life, and I again wouldn’t be here without them), but I think the overall biggest influence in my life really is Sailor Moon. So, I’m going to leave it at that.

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And show off my Sailor Moon ink, too, of course. It’s my first of many planned Sailor Moon inspired tattoos!